Taylor and I are doing our 2nd project on the Shearwaters Radar
Newell is spelled wrong. For point #2, you need to do a better job of explaining what the Merlan Avian Radar is. Carey's sound bite that you chose, doesn't really explain what the radar is. Take a look at what he answered for question 4. He gave you that answer. Use it first to explain what the radar is then you can go into how it works. You also have a quote that is listed three times in your script. You need to be careful how you word your sentences. "With the radar, shearwaters have many benefits." The shearwaters benefit FROM the use of the radar. Your VO about it having many locations around the island really isn't true. It's based out of one location most of the time but can and has been moved at times to track the patterns in different areas. The way you wrote it sounds like there are a bunch of radars on the island. There is just one that moves from place to place. Be careful on your last VO too. Has the radar helped decrease deaths? I don't see anything about that in any interviews that you've used in your script.
I'm so Kelli, you already know me, I'm in Me-dia, from 7th grade to 8th grade oh, (I'm so Kelli, with Im so Fancy Melody)Made by Ben Brady